Personal - Conflict

One of the essay questions from the 2012-2013 University of Toronto application cycle. 

Tell us about a conflict you had with another person and how you maintained a respectful 
relationship with them.

Journalist Dorothy Thompson famously observed that: “peace is not the absence of conflict but the presence of creative alternatives for responding to conflict.” I believe conflict is inevitable in any professional setting, but it always presents a creative opportunity to develop and reinforce interpersonal relationships. In the summer of my third year, I worked with another summer student on a joint research project in [PI name]'s laboratory. Unfortunately within the first few weeks it became apparent that she was not completing the majority of her work. My initial gut feeling was frustration; the success of our project depended on a collaborative team effort. However, I was reminded by the wisdom of a good friend to “be kind, for everyone you know is fighting a hard battle”, and I aimed to resolve this conflict in a professional, mature, and understanding manner. I invited her out to coffee and listened to her concerns about the project. Through our conversations, I learned that she had been struggling with some difficult family situations in recent months. I therefore challenged myself to see the world from her perspective and respond in a kind and understanding manner. We mutually agreed to re-divide our responsibilities, and having had more research training, I offered to tackle the more demanding experiments. She agreed and we had a healthy relationship and highly productive work experience that summer. I am proud to say that we remain good friends to this day.